An Overwhelming Torrent

Since becoming a philosophy major, I have continually felt overwhelmed by wave upon wave of information, ideas, and beliefs. I read A New Kind of Christian and Blue Like Jazz and think, "This is truth! This is how we should live!" I converse with those older and wiser then me, deep thinkers who are appropriately in the field of philosophy and my mind is flooded with doubt that brings me to borderline madness and anguish; somehow, by the graces of God, I come back to Him although I never really left. I watch I Heart Hucabees and know that at least a hint of truth can be found there -- but where? I know that if God is God, then the truth of our existence, of Him, of our salvation is beyond the grasp of infinitesimal minds. But the atheist claims (and rightfully I believe) that that is begging the question.

My pastor this morning explained why the Old Testament prophets were so angry and frustrated, but still hopeful. The message was powerful and convicting, a call for true Christians to leave behind the apathy of wealth and comfort and serve the needy as Christ calls us to. Already a negative stereotype of Christians is being potrayed by the media -- watch Saved and I Heart Hucabees if you have any doubt, and it is far from flattering -- unthinking, blind, and detached from the world. Yet people like Pastor Dan, John Piper and others are bringing us back to the world that needs the salvation of Christ. I have a feeling that the Christian Church in America is going to end up much the same way as Texas State. A few years of less then reputable behavior will take decades to overcome.

So what am I trying to say in this scattered and uncolleceted post? David Crowder expresses it best:

I feel I'm drowning,
My arms are just too tired to swim
I feel I'm sinking
On my knees again

In the roar of Your waterfall
In the storm of You,
May You find me holding on,
May You find me true